So I Quit…
I stopped trying to please people and it felt rejuvenating. After a lifetime of being a people pleaser and over compensator, I left those titles and characteristics behind.
What did I leave behind?
What did I gain?
-Power over my destiny.
-More time and energy for myself.
-Brain space to engage in gaining more knowledge and wisdom.
-Me, I gained ME!
It had been a long time coming. It was damaged behavior over time until I was living in the damage, consciously. Now, who would want to be in this state when you have a strong awareness? Do you know you have the ability to change it and have all the options to do so but stick with it? That’s trauma within itself. So I leaped off into my next destiny, identifying the ugly truth of it all that, “I made a choice to overly give into others who wouldn’t do the same for me.”
Ok, now that was harsh! But it’s the truth, this was all of my doing. Although I learned the behavior, I continued to take ownership of it and fancy it up to soothe my own needs. The whole time I was doing that, I wasn’t fully aware of what my own needs were. Ahhh, that sounds very foolish of me but that’s the reality of it all.
So here I am, 2 years later and I’ve released a lifetime of unhealthy traits in a short period of time. It was needed and the best thing that I did was to take accountability for my own actions within the chaos I experienced. I formulated a better me, a safe and happy me. So when I speak to myself, I’m no longer a mad me, trying to play the victim and accuse everyone else of doing bad to me.
I take full responsibility and ownership of me. I am proud of myself. Now it’s time for you to do the same for you!
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Shawnee Palmer, LCSW, LAC
Alpine’s Empowerment Agency, LLC
Love & Serenity Wellness